It’s with heavy hearts that we report Joe Keery, whose luscious hair sent teenagers and grown adults alike swooning, got bangs.
The Stranger Things star appeared at a dinner hosted by Chanel with the remains of his once-glorious hair hacked away. What was left can only be described as a Will Byers-esque bowl cut complete with choppy FRINGE BANGS. His hair, known for its voluminous waves, also appears straightened.
Let’s just take a moment of silence to remember a legend.
What prompted Keery to get rid of his signature mullet, the one characteristic that single-handedly carved him a spot in America’s collective heart? The man once gave a detailed interview to GQ, describing the very process that breathed life into his hair, and told the reporter, “Do I get recognized? I guess it depends on if I’m wearing a hat or not. The hairdo is a dead giveaway. There’s nothing I can do. It’s just the way my hair grows.”
Was he tired of being recognized in the street? Did he want to blend in with the skaters of Los Angeles, who don’t have time for the hairspray and wash schedule that Keery spent the last two years adhering to? Did he go through some sort of crisis in the Upside Down that prompted him to get bangs?
Maybe he’s following in the footsteps of another hair legend, Harry Styles. Styles recently devastated fans worldwide when he cut off his signature Big Hair in favor of scraggly bowl cut.
Whatever it was that prompted him to do it, fans are mourning the loss.
joe keery is playing will byers next season
— shi🌻 IS ON A CRUISE (@darlingkeery) September 13, 2019
Friday the 13th and the spookiest thing I saw today was Joe Keery’s haircut.
— Damfino ⍟⃝ (@LadyDamfino) September 14, 2019
Joe, we’ll be here for you when the Hair is back. But until then, we’ll be keening in a corner and draping black shrouds over every hairdryer, mousse, and wide-tooth comb we find.